I am a member of a FaceBook page specifically designed as a platform for progressives in my very conservative area of the state. Living in this part of our state as a liberal feels very lonely, feels very much like being a solitary voice crying out in the political wilderness, so this site assures me that there are others who share my perspectives. The posts on the site are affirming/accepting/supporting/advocating for all of the issues you would expect: GLBTQ, reproductive rights, social justice, voter rights, and others. And on the flip side, there are posts against book banning, conspiracy theories, The Big Lie, the erosion of our democracy. The admins are active, most,if not all, posts include reference links, and the members self-monitor to include news that is verifiably true…usually.
Which brings me to the “no excuse” point of my blog. Last year,I attended a rally for reproductive rights in my town and both my adult daughter and son came with me. My son, for the record, is an amazing person and I credit him with educating me and expanding my awareness, commitment, advocacy, and action around issues of injustice; in fact, my first participation in an anti-war march was with him. The rally, though mostly women, also included men and families. My son, who was wearing an appropriately captioned T-shirt and looks as much like a trouble-maker as Mr. Rogers, loves to document experiences and he left my daughter and me to walk around the gathering taking photos and videos.
It was a great day standing up for an important cause with two of my favorite people…until a friend messaged me to ask if I’d seen the posts on the aforementioned FaceBook site. There were a number of posts questioning the presence of a suspicious, possibly an infiltrator up-to-no-good (my interpretation, as the posts were all eventually taken down) man taking photos and videos of people at the rally; the posts actually included someone’s video stalking my son. (In allowing the numerous posts. the admin had at least included a caveat saying he had allowed the posts with some misgiving because there was no proof- ie, such as someone actually speaking to the man who was causing some concern.) This Mama Bear immediately posted a reply, informing this (supposedly unbiased, non-judgemental, educated, stereotype-avoiding, “we’re all in this struggle together”) group that this “troublemaker” was my son who totally supports reproductive rights.
The admin quickly replied to me and took down all of the relevant posts, including, unfortunately, my explanation. There was no further explanation given, no apology, no reassurance that the concerns were not legitimate, no reminder of the danger of jumping to conclusions, especially and ironically based totally on gender; it was as if the thread had never happened. Why didn’t any of the concerned participants actually talk to my (totally unintimidating) son? Why wasn’t my post of explanation allowed to remain on the site? Why did this group, that I’ve had great respect for, make the erroneous snap judgment that he (and not all of the others taking photographs and videos) was the “troll”. No excuse.
— cmshingle
Which brings me to the “no excuse” point of my blog. Last year,I attended a rally for reproductive rights in my town and both my adult daughter and son came with me. My son, for the record, is an amazing person and I credit him with educating me and expanding my awareness, commitment, advocacy, and action around issues of injustice; in fact, my first participation in an anti-war march was with him. The rally, though mostly women, also included men and families. My son, who was wearing an appropriately captioned T-shirt and looks as much like a trouble-maker as Mr. Rogers, loves to document experiences and he left my daughter and me to walk around the gathering taking photos and videos.
It was a great day standing up for an important cause with two of my favorite people…until a friend messaged me to ask if I’d seen the posts on the aforementioned FaceBook site. There were a number of posts questioning the presence of a suspicious, possibly an infiltrator up-to-no-good (my interpretation, as the posts were all eventually taken down) man taking photos and videos of people at the rally; the posts actually included someone’s video stalking my son. (In allowing the numerous posts. the admin had at least included a caveat saying he had allowed the posts with some misgiving because there was no proof- ie, such as someone actually speaking to the man who was causing some concern.) This Mama Bear immediately posted a reply, informing this (supposedly unbiased, non-judgemental, educated, stereotype-avoiding, “we’re all in this struggle together”) group that this “troublemaker” was my son who totally supports reproductive rights.
The admin quickly replied to me and took down all of the relevant posts, including, unfortunately, my explanation. There was no further explanation given, no apology, no reassurance that the concerns were not legitimate, no reminder of the danger of jumping to conclusions, especially and ironically based totally on gender; it was as if the thread had never happened. Why didn’t any of the concerned participants actually talk to my (totally unintimidating) son? Why wasn’t my post of explanation allowed to remain on the site? Why did this group, that I’ve had great respect for, make the erroneous snap judgment that he (and not all of the others taking photographs and videos) was the “troll”. No excuse.
— cmshingle
Wow! So sorry you and your son had to experience that! And thank you for rallying in the first place! I do worry that any of us, these days, might jump to conclusions and judgements and hurt each other's feelings (or bodied!) as a sad result...
ReplyDeleteSo true, so easy to jump to wrong conclusions and hurt other people. Ah, Facebook, the risks are great! The rally itself was an encouraging experience, so much bigger than I expected!
ReplyDelete